If I had the guts, I would tell the truth. Everyone has been asking me for ages to tell the truth about what really happened—all of it. I have the archives, after all. Maybe then some people would finally repent. (If only that was how it worked.) But that’s the problem with current society’s trial by social media and the whole concept of cancel culture. Yeah, I have a story to tell. But this isn’t how you tell it.

On Wednesday, Kevin Hart was announced to be the new host of the Academy Awards. By Thursday, he had already stepped down following his refusal to apologize for homophobic and insensitive tweets from a decade ago. To Hart’s credit, he finally did apologize after he turned down the Academy’s ultimatum to repent or quit. Hart quitting and then apologizing actually showed genuine remorse, in my opinion.

But here’s the main issue: should he have been forced into an apology in the first place? No, I don’t agree with what Hart tweeted ten years ago. But which one of us haven’t said something offensive on social media in the past that no longer aligns with our current beliefs? I can’t even begin to delve into the barrage of public figure misconduct posts that the internet sleuths have dug up to bury careers. There are several gaping problems with the society crusade to make everything politically correct.

For one, fear of offending others has almost rendered comedy nearly obsolete. Yeah, we can say things without causing damage. But it’s pretty difficult to navigate this tumultuous world without throwing your hands up and making an off-color joke every now and then. Unfortunately, in the age of the Internet, everything will come back to haunt you. And when you’re being monitored in an almost Big Brother society, it really does feel like we’re one step away from the Thought Police shutting us down. Honestly, what are the eyes of the Internet not able to invade?

That brings me to a second point: trial by social media. The “Me, Too” movement has been both brilliant and brilliantly flawed. For one, it’s extremely empowering to finally find your voice. You know what, we should live in a society where real predators are afraid. Really afraid. Unfortunately, it’s up to social media warriors to weed the guilty from the falsely accused. And even more unfortunately, the latter category is often vacated when left in the hands of the Internet. Ah, how quick we are to judge, yet so reluctant to admit to our own faults.

I know the justice system is flawed, but we need to address serious accusations on platforms that provide both parties with the right for a proper defense. I don’t believe that false accusations are a commonality. But we also don’t have the right to persecute people without supporting evidence. We live in a rather explosive society. For all the tolerance I pride my generation with fostering, we need to also take the time to listen to all sides of the story. And you know what? Sometimes it really isn’t our business to determine guilt.

I don’t agree with racism, sexism, homophobia, or xenophobia. I’m also really glad I had the sense to delete my Facebook in 2012, because middle school and high school me might have mislead you with cringe-inducing slang. The bottom line is this: we’re all human. Transience is the defining factor of our entire foundation. Like it or not, we are never going to be the same people we used to be. We have the chance to transform, for better or worse.

We don’t become a better people overnight. But I don’t think it is fair to persecute people for things they said when they were in a more ignorant state of mind if all other factors point to them currently being a more evolved human being. Is someone apologizing because they got caught? Or have they grown up so much that they can’t even recognize the person they once were? We have the right to make our amends; and it is really up to those who we have offended to forgive us for our sins.

If you’re reading this, that’s why I didn’t bring it to the Internet. See, you can find your peace without calling people out. It really is possible.